Is The Trigger The Gift?

What is a trigger and no I am not talking about a horse….


A trigger is that moment when something happens that stops you, takes you back to the moment of invention only it appears to be about the present moment and causes a reaction that catches you off guard.

How much do you avoid triggering others or the trigger in you?

What if the trigger is a signal that says; hey, we can let go now, we don’t have to  hold onto the memory, pain, belief, idea, and so on? ( when I say we, I am including the body)

What if avoiding it is actually the unkindness you are doing to you, your body and everyone else and the reaction you have when it happens is the part of you that desires to hold onto what ever it brings up?

I spent several years bringing up, being in and processing through triggers with a group of people dedicated to the same thing.  I don’t know if it was the goal of the processing, the belief of the group or just my idea, that someday I would be free of triggers and “healed”.  Seems somewhere I bought that getting triggered meant I was still broken.

Well if that is true, I am screwed in choosing to have children…

I have this funny thing I like to say, “there are few people left on this planet that can trigger me and, they have either come out of my vagina or, they are trying to get in it.”

My kids can trigger me so quickly that I don’t even see it coming and it has nothing to do with being broken or unhealed, nothing to do with them being bad, wrong or malicious of any nature.  The mere fact that I have a vested interest in their well being and they have total choice in life creates a possibility for a trigger and it’s a gift.

A gift in allowance, letting go, getting out of a stuck point of view and creating greater relationships through acknowledging  it.

Sometimes those kids have judgments and points of view that trigger me and it’s like a stab in the heart and still, it’s just the way is goes with them.  They are bound to get to you even if only once in awhile and one at a time.

It’s still a gift, and sometimes the gift is in the letting go of the need to get it right.

The men are a different story and still a gift in growing awareness and choice.  I mean, if we are looking at what is actually presenting in front of us, ask some questions and trust the awareness, most likely, we can avoid the moment of being blind sided


So often, in my reality anyway, I get caught up in something else and stop paying attention.

Can you really avoid a trigger?

Have you tried?

I have tried and it actually doesn’t work.  It may look like it on the outside and the ignition of it sits there, then the next thing happens and the next thing till,  it lights right up and comes out in a way that may be less beneficial than the initial exposure of something coming up.

What if instead of the avoidance of the trigger, judgment of self because there is a trigger or pretending they don’t happen, we embrace the moment and ask ourselves, what is this?  Is there something here I am not willing to see?  Is this even mine? What can I do to change this and so on?

and what about avoiding the trigger in others?

Do you do that?


Have you ever found yourself walking on eggshells to avoid triggering another person?  How much do you have to change you to walk on egg shells?  Is it actually a kindness to you or the other person to avoid the trigger?  What if being you triggers them and, you do it anyway?  Are you actually responsible for the reaction of others and what if you being you and triggering someone else is the gift you can be to them?


What if being you is ALWAYS the gift to you?





One thought on “Is The Trigger The Gift?

  1. Love it! This is the type of conversation I have been having lately with myself. I didn’t realize how often I tried to change me to avoid triggering someone else. In the past few months I have been so aware of that tendency in my life that I have consciously allowed others to be triggered and actually find that I can have empathy for them in their dilemma while maintaining my confidence and strength and even humor in the situation. Love you and your input, enjoy this type of discussion so very much. Thank you!


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